Thursday, August 11, 2011

You Might Just Be a Redneck if...

I don't know, there are so many fitting titles to this post I just can't choose!

You Might Just Be a Redneck if...

You Might Have Overly Sensitive Skin if...

You Might Need New Underwear if...

You Might Just Kill Your Wife After You Read This Post...

You can let me know which one you think I should use after reading this post.

Okay, here is how the story starts...

One day the Country Chicken Girl was busy folding laundry, nothing new, she has done this for most of her life... la, dee, la, dee, dah... boring, some mundane task...

When all of the sudden she stumbles upon something particularly strange in the laundry basket...

a band-aid stuck on a pair of Dan the Man's underwear.

Band-aid stuck to the underwear.

"Hmmm.... that's odd, I don't remember anyone requiring a band-aid this week" thinks the County Chicken Girl to herself.

She was thinking that somehow the band-aid ended up in the dirty clothes, just like how kleenex or movie tickets and sometimes even money end up in the laundry. Surely you all that do the laundry know what I am talking about.

As she started to peel the band-aid off Dan the Man's underwear, she began to contemplate the location of the band-aid and noticed how it was "too" perfectly placed on the waistband of the underwear. Placed just so delicately as to cover the part where the tag usually is.

Now mind you this was no ordinary "plastic or vinyl type" band-aid, it was one of those soft, fabric type ones.

As she was removing the band-aid, she noticed that the tag of the underwear was also missing and the seam on the waistband was coming undone.

Now being married to Dan the Man for 15 years, the Country Chicken Girl feels like she knows him inside and out. She chuckles to herself because she realizes that the band-aid had indeed been strategically placed on the waistband of the underwear by none other than Dan the Man.

You see, Dan the Man has extremely sensitive skin and can not stand any tags that touch his body. Apparently even the ones in his underwear! And being the ingenious man that Dan is, his solution to the problem was the band-aid.

See how the band-aid was strategically placed over the seam that was coming apart?

The Country Chicken Girls continues to chuckle to herself and decides to place the band-aid back in it's location, folds the underwear and puts them away (but not before taking a picture of them, this was too good of a blog post to pass up!). The Country Chicken Girl continues with the folding of the laundry all the while wondering if Dan the Man was going to say something about that pair of underwear. She also contemplated over writing a blog post about the discovery or to not post anything.

She finally decided that it was much too funny not to post about. People need a little giggle every once in a while and surely Dan the Man won't mind. Or will he? She figures she is safe for several days... maybe several weeks since Dan the Man is so busy and has not been reading her blog. She also wonders why Dan the Man didn't just throw away the underwear? and will he wear them again when he comes upon them in his drawer?

I think I will buy my man Dan some new underwear next time I am at the store!

The End.


  1. Funny....but I think he's gonna be mad! ; )
    Michelle T>

  2. This is freaking hilarious. It is so Danny!!

  3. I agree with Carla! Once, long ago, he cut off his eyelashes because his sisters and their friends kept telling him how lucky he was to have such long eyelases!

  4. My daughter wore clothing with irritating seams inside-out. Had she discovered Bandaids, folks would have thought her a little LESS odd. Way to go, Dan-the-Man!