Today I thought I would share my scrumptious chicken feed recipe with you. Why, because I love you. But you have to promise not to give it to anyone. It is an Open A Bar 2 Ranch trade secret. Dan the Boss Man would fire me if he knew I was telling you...
What did I just say...
Dan the Boss Man would fire me if he knew I was telling you...
Wait one second, I'll be right back. I've got to go tell Dan the Boss Man that I am telling you our trade secret chicken feed recipe. I hope I get fired!! Wish me luck!
Okay, I'm back.
He didn't care, what a waste of time.
Oh well, here's the recipe.
Open A Bar 2 Ranch Chicken Feed
(TOP SECRET!)
(TOP SECRET!)
2200 lbs corn
40 buckets of corn now and 40 buckets at the end...
dump corn into mixer...
It's helpful to keep track of how many buckets you have filled and dumped...
dump in two 60 lb bags of Nutri-Balancer
1/2 of 50 lb Bag of Kelp
dump the kelp in the mixer...
One 50 lb bag of calcium...
Three 50 lb bags of Fishmeal...
Dump 'er all in there...
Pee-U, this stuff stinks...
Six 80 lb bags of Oats...
Dan the Man... He's so strong...
Might be easier to lift with the both of us. Too bad your hired hand is taking pictures of you instead of helping you!
956 lb of Soy Bean Meal...
Hey dude, that looks like tons of fun!
Oops, you spilled some, better scoop it up! We might has only gotten 955 lbs in there.
40 more buckets of corn...
Mix 'er up real good...
Uh, Dan the Man...
You've got chicken feed dust all over your face.
You've got chicken feed dust all over your face.
Beat around on the mixer for a while...
This is a requirement and daily occurrence with all pieces of farm machinery!
This is a requirement and daily occurrence with all pieces of farm machinery!
Crawl under the mixer and beat on it from under there...
Uh, Dan the Man...
You be careful under there.
Do not attempt this at home. This is being done by a trained professional!
Uh, Dan the Man...
You be careful under there.
Do not attempt this at home. This is being done by a trained professional!
Auger it into the storage box...
OOOO look at 'er go!
That's a whole mess of feed, that there it is...
Feels like gold dust running through your fingers...
I think?!?
Never felt gold dust running through my fingers,
but this must be what it feels like!
I think?!?
Never felt gold dust running through my fingers,
but this must be what it feels like!
Wow, wee, look at all that feed...
I SAID...
WOW, WEE LOOK AT ALL THE FEED!
Maybe he could hear if his ear wasn't full of chicken feed dust!
WOW, WEE LOOK AT ALL THE FEED!
Maybe he could hear if his ear wasn't full of chicken feed dust!
Crawl into the mixer and shovel all the feed into the auger...
IMPORTANT: MAKE SURE THE MIXER IS TURNED OFF
IMPORTANT: MAKE SURE THE MIXER IS TURNED OFF
Crawl on outta there...
Dude, you are really dirty...
Maybe we should be wearing dust masks...
Good thing my mother doesn't know I do this...
I can just hear her now...
"You two really should be wearing dusk masks!"
Good thing my mother doesn't know I do this...
I can just hear her now...
"You two really should be wearing dusk masks!"
Don't worry mom...
We can use the air compressor to blow the dust off,
It works real spiffy...
Just look at how it is blowing Dan the Man's hair,
but I don't think it's going to blow that gray hair away!
We can use the air compressor to blow the dust off,
It works real spiffy...
Just look at how it is blowing Dan the Man's hair,
but I don't think it's going to blow that gray hair away!
REPEAT PROCEDURE THREE TIMES!!
Seriously...
We've got a lot of chickens to feed.
And this isn't even enough to last the whole summer.
Last, but not to be forgotten...
Take a nap in the corn...
Oh Lordy, if my Grandma was alive she would be fit-to-be-tied if she saw this picture or heard that I did this! When we were children we use to play at our grandparents farm. Remember Lori? We would run around in the grain and Grandma always told us to never get into the corn or we would sink to the bottom just like we were in a bottomless pit of quick sand. We would deliberately disobey Grandma and sure as snow in March, we'd run up to the top and back down the big piles of corn they had to feed the cattle. When we would come back into the house our shoes would be full of corn and we would get "the lecture."
Look Grandma, I'm in the corn and I am not sinking to the bottom!!
WARNING: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME OR YOU MIGHT SINK TO THE BOTTOM JUST LIKE YOU ARE IN A BOTTOMLESS PIT OF QUICK SAND.
THE CORN WILL EVENTUALLY SUFFOCATE YOU AND YOUR NOSE AND MOUTH WILL BE FILLED WITH CORN AND YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO BREATHE! SERIOUSLY!
Look Grandma, I'm in the corn and I am not sinking to the bottom!!
WARNING: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME OR YOU MIGHT SINK TO THE BOTTOM JUST LIKE YOU ARE IN A BOTTOMLESS PIT OF QUICK SAND.
THE CORN WILL EVENTUALLY SUFFOCATE YOU AND YOUR NOSE AND MOUTH WILL BE FILLED WITH CORN AND YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO BREATHE! SERIOUSLY!
Having given that warning, I must say that laying on a bed of corn feels so neat-o. I wouldn't mind a bed of corn. It conforms to every contour and curve of your body and provides support like no other mattress I have ever experienced. The kernels of corn are mystically cool (as in cold to the touch) and feel so wonderful on hot tired achy muscles.
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Hi Kathi, I enjoy reading your blog. Takes me back to my farmgirl childhood.
ReplyDeleteTwo comments
1. I had the dubious honor of being the one to crawl inside the grain mill when it broke down (always when it was full) because I was the only one on the farm that could fit through the access hole. I swear that the allergies I have now come from all that dust I inhaled. No masks for us either.
2. Ever see the Harrison Ford movie "Witness"? Where the bad guys get it in the grain silo?
Thanks for reading my blog Karen! I did see "Witness" but I don't remember the grain silo scene. I probably feel asleep during that scene but I can guess what happened!
ReplyDeleteFortunately I never had to do that......Dan the Man must be a quick learner because cattle ranchers don't need to mix grain! Looks like fun! J/K
ReplyDelete